With my birthday fast approaching, I thought it’d be fun to check in on the 30 financial milestones to reach by age 30 that have been floating around the internet for a while. How many of these did I manage to check off the list? Read on for my shocking confessions!

1. Financially independent of your parents. That ship sailed a while ago- pretty much right out of school. We worked off $30K in student loans, paid for our wedding and put together a down payment with our own hard earned cash. Emily did live with her parents for almost two years after graduating as we saved up to get hitched. I, on the other hand, had the good fortunes of crashing in a basement apartment of a rooming house. It was cheap ok? Good times all around.

2. Debt free. Technically, the mortgage is debt, so no. That said, credit cards are paid off in full each cycle and there aren’t any other loans to speak of.

3. Out of overdraft. What’s overdraft?

4. Established good credit history. At last check, ye ole credit score was hanging out at 782.

5. Have $25,000+ saved for retirement. Check and then some.

6. Started an investment portfolio. We started investing with TD e-Series index funds shortly after the birth of Big Brother. It’s great knowing that my portfolio will continue to grow over the long term without having to keep an eye on the market.

We don’t have an emergency fund.

7. Established an emergency fund. Yes, we did have a traditional emergency fund but we now take a little bit more of an unconventional approach. We’re comfortable with our habits and our financial health so we have our emergency savings  invested in the TFSA.

8. Properly insured. Health: check (thanks Canada). Life: check. Content and car: check. Disability: hmmm, maybe we should look into that?

9. Maximizing employer benefits. We participate in our company defined benefit contribution plans where contributing a percentage of our income is matched by our employer. Use it or lose it.

10. In the habit of tracking your spending. I use a combination of spreadsheets and You Need a Budget a.k.a. YNAB (referral link) to track our spending and net worth.

11. Done with impulse purchases. Apparently, I’m a robot and have no impulses. Just ask Emily.

12. Willing to spend where it counts. Korea, Brazil, or that time we took off to tour Asia. I’ve been called all sorts of crazy for not paying for mobile phone data, but it’s tradeoffs like these that enable our jet setting ways.

13. In the habit of regularly checking your credit report. Once a year. Like clockwork.

14. On top or ahead of all your monthly bills. Paid in full. Also like clockwork.

We use credit cards for almost everything.

15. At least one big splurge you saved up for and paid in full with cash. Wedding, car and travel aside- Laser. Eye. Surgery. Best $4,500 I ever spent. I diligently saved my monthly allowance and sold off a bunch of my prized possessions (ciao, xbox) to pay for it. I did not, however, pay for it in cash; you don’t get travel reward points for that, silly. I paid with a credit card and cleared the balance at the end of the month.

16. An understanding of personal income taxes and how to minimize what you pay. UFile is my friend. Maxback does all the work for me. Ok, admittedly, I could do better.

17. Diligently saving for a big purchase. See #12. or #15.

18. A clear direction of your career. I’m still sorting out what I want to do when I grow up. Astronaut, rock star or pro football (soccer to you, weirdos) player.

19. A profitable side income. TBD. Side hustles abound. Whether they’re profitable is another story.

20. A positive, growing net worth. We kids are alright.

21. A BHAG for your finances. Big Hairy Audacious Goal? Where do I start? Raise $10K to build a health clinic in Nigeria. Save 50% of our income. That’s a bit of a stretch, because daycare, but give it a few years and maybe we’ll hit it. Got your binoculars? You’re looking at some form of entrepreneurship with what looks like location independence off in the distance.

22. An understanding and a plan of how your money will deliver the lifestyle you want. We’ve carefully considered the trade offs we’re willing to make to live the lifestyle we want. Living in a smaller space helps us avoid being house rich and cash poor. It’s not without its perks: Chatime is just around the corner.

23. So over measuring your finances against that of your friends. I find it helpful to focus on the things I can change rather than thinking about things that are out of my control.

We’ve never had cable- not even growing up.

24. Less consumption-oriented. One of the lessons we’ve gleaned from our travels is how people can live contently with little. Wealth isn’t defined by material possessions and we’re working to break the curse of excessive consumerism.

25. A healthy relationship with credit cards. Sure, if an addiction to travel rewards is healthy. At the risk of sounding like a broken record, credit cards get paid off every month.

26. A regular contribution to charity. We’re fortunate to lead incredibly blessed lives, and I believe it is on us to be a blessing to those around us. If I’ve learned anything from my 3 year old, it is to give- and give freely. Like the man named Picasso once said “The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.”

27. If you’re part of a couple, a healthy way of sharing money with your partner. We have combined finances and use a joint bank account- that works for us. No matter the situation, transparency and trust are paramount; we are working towards the same goals, after all.

28. A commitment to putting free or cheap before convenient. We haven’t eaten out in over two months. I don’t mind; Emily is a chef extraordinaire. She, on the other hand, has been known to gaze longingly at pastries through pane glass windows.

29. Done paying unnecessary fees. After years of keeping minimum balances avoid banking fees, I switched to no-fee banking a few years ago and invested the balance. Cable television is also an unnecessary fee. Yeah, that’s right. I said it.

30. An understanding and appreciation for the reality that money is only a tool of exchange, and not worth obsessing over. Learning to put our money on autopilot has really allowed us to take on and tackle the things that we really care about. While it certainly can be helpful, it is not a prerequisite to living a life with purpose in accordance with your values.

My big confession: I’m actually turning 31! To celebrate, I’m throwing in a bonus milestone.

31. Maintain a will. Yeah, we have one. But this is more of a reminder that I still need to add Little Sister to it.

The Last Word

While this is a fun exercise, don’t get caught in the trap of comparing your progress with someone else’s. Every person’s situation is different and the milestones within reach will depend on your specific set of circumstances. Maybe you just finished grad school or are experiencing sleepless nights with a newborn- some of these milestones will come easier than others. As you work towards achieving some of these goals, keep this in mind:

“The secret of getting ahead is getting started. The secret of getting started is breaking your complex overwhelming tasks into small manageable tasks, and starting on the first one.”
-Mark Twain

This collection of 30 financial milestones to reach by 30 is by no means a definitive list. Break down the milestones into manageable steps and get started. Before long, you’ll be checking them off your list.

Which milestones do you feel are the best place to start?

3 year olds are exhausting. They wake up at the crack of dawn, throw food all over clean floors and conveniently wake up screaming just as you fall asleep. And they make you worry: about how much they eat, how much they sleep and what they’re learning. And yet the amazing thing about kids, as any parent will agree, is how quickly they absorb things around them and how their observations are reflected in their behaviour. They watch, they observe, and they pick up on nuances that otherwise go unnoticed. By watching him, I’ve picked up few things of my own. Here are a few things about money I’m learning from my 3 year old.

On Spending

We like to give Big Brother options and ask him to choose: which shirt do you want to wear, do you want an apple or an orange for snack, you get the idea. The illusion of choice helps with decision making and increases his independence and confidence. One fine summer evening, Emily was on one of her online shopping benders, picking out trendy local handmade fashions. Armed with a few choices, she opted to let him make up his mind.

“No Mama,” he said. “I already have lots of clothes and I wear them all the time. I don’t need new ones.” Emily reluctantly agreed. No money was spent that day.

Kids don’t have to be as expensive as we make them out to be. Sure, new outfits have their place but purchases tend to satisfy our needs rather than theirs. Come to think about it, we also have a closet full of clothes. What else are we buying that we just don’t need?

On Saving

A few months ago, we re-painted our condo in varying shades of white. Vehemently disapproving of our design aesthetic, Big Brother declared that he is saving up his money to buy a house with dark blue walls. Now, any coin that he comes across goes right into his piggy bank to save for his house of his dreams. He still hasn’t given up on his vision and continues to remind us of his steadfast resolve. Yet, on his weekly farmer’s market visits, he takes out a quarter for a cup of tasty apple cider.

It isn’t hard to save for long terms goals if you know what you want and you want it enough. It’s also important not to lose sight of the short term needs and enjoy the little things that make the effort worth the while.

On Having Fun

Every time I travel for work, I come back with a surprise for Big Brother. Each of those surprises have contributed to an impressive collection of Pixar Cars that he lines up on the floor of his room. He loves Lightning McQueen and all his “Cars with eyes.” They are his toys of choice and he plays with them ALL. THE. TIME.

Until recently. The cars have been spending more time tucked away in their basket because Big Brother has discovered a love for books. Books we bring back from our weekly trips to the library. Don’t get me wrong, he loves the cars but it it may just be that the books are more interesting.

Toys, the latest tech gadgets and a new handbags end up collecting dust and are poor alternatives to a good book, learning new skills and picking up new hobbies. Some of the best things are free.

On Generosity

Social responsibility is a topic that comes up in conversation around the dinner table every so often: the earthquake in Nepal, the ongoing crisis in Syria and most recently, our family project to fundraise for a health clinic in Nigeria. Upon first hearing about the situation in Nepal, Big Brother asked if the people who had lost their homes to the earthquake could come live with us. On hearing that women in parts of Nigeria do not have doctors to help them birth babies, he responded saying that we should “fly them here so they can go see Mama’s doctor.”

The innocence in the genuine compassion of a child is something we should take to heart. If there’s anything to be learned here, it is to give- and to give freely- to those in need.

The Last Word

Buy what you need. Save for what you want. Fun doesn’t have to cost much. Give to those in need. We are so consumed with feeding our children with information that we often forget the lessons about life- and money- can come from the unlikeliest of places. There’s something to be said about the unassuming logic of a 3 year old and when we take the time to notice, the lessons we can learn resonate with ageless wisdom.